Why Software Engineering?

Through the last two weeks, I've asked myself so many questions.
// I'm smart right?
// Have I just been telling myself I'm smart?
// Is it worth all this time and money and stress?
// Is it ever going to "click" or do the next five months exist in a perpetual state of uncomfortable ambiguity?
// I made it work, but how?

Of everything I've learned during the First Mile, I feel like I haven't learned the answers. I feel confident in the difference between arrays and hashes and .sort and .collect, but when it comes to confidence in myself, I'm still struggling.

I guess I should just focus on the positive?
The joy of that green code is unmatched. The gratification and dopamine rush following a difficult problem has become something I crave.
The rush of helping someone understand a concept is wonderful.
Answering a prompt confidently makes me beam with pride.

The main objective of this blog post assignment was to describe "Why did you chose this path?"
I started working in restaurants when I was 14, washing dishes under the table for the diner at the end of my block. After years of the service industry I transitioned to retail. I recognize that these are important and valuable positions that require so much care and patience and understanding. However, it's taken me a long time to realize I may be capable of more? I want to be challenged and confused. I selfishly want documentation that I am smart enough. I want my life to be different.

So as I reflect back on things I've learned this week and questions I still have, hopefully I can continue to learn the answers.